Showing posts with label Creative non-fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Creative non-fiction. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

1: The Tale of the Gidi Prince (Inspired by True Life Events)



Once upon a time, in the year 2015, on a coastal metropolitan city far far away, known as Lagos (aka Gidi), lived a wealthy prince. The prince was the most handsome in the land (or so he thought) and had slain many a foe and fought many battles (on his PS 4). 


The prince was not actually from Gidi but had relocated from his kingdom which was a couple of hours away, to look for a day job. Being a prince was no longer as prestigious as it once was. All he had to show for his royal heritage, was a name and strange tribal praises from toothless old women during family festivities.  He now had to actually work for his pay and luxury. 

Nevertheless, he did pretty well (because he had family connections). He worked in oil and gas. The ultimate chic-magnet.
His noble stead; a BMW hybrid (2014) complete with a 3.0L I6 engine. 
His loft apartment towered above life below on the island,  overlooking the Ocean on one side and the mainland in the distance from another. 

He had three scheduled meal times, daily, complete with a tea break at 4pm, which Effiong, the chef, catered to.
Life was good for this modern-day prince. He had everything. Everything, but a princess. The prince knew the time had come to find a suitable bride.

All his friends were engaged or married or paying child support. O yes, the time had come. The Queen (his mum) could not stress this enough. The time had come for her to be a grandmother, a statement she made as she rolled theatrically on the ground and crying whenever he went home to visit (which was why he didn't visit very often). 

Soon, he gave into the Queen’s emotional blackmail and decided to find a worthy maiden on the streets of Gidi. At least, he didn't have to endure the plight of the real fairytale princes who had to ride out on horses for months, looking for some princess in a castle with a giant moat. With a sore butt, he would have to slay some psycho dragon and then on occasion, kiss the princess who had been sleeping for years (the breath on that one. Pheeew!)  Not in this fairytale. He would ride out in his coupe and the girls would flock, he'd buy one a drink and in three months they'd be wed. Life had become so much more easier. 

Now, the prince wasn't looking for some Gold digger. Gold diggers were to be avoided like a plague according to page 23 of "The Handbook of Successful Prince-ing”. Luckily, he had Instagram and could do his research before he ventured out into the wilderness and cross the seven seas to find his princess.

 By the seven seas, he meant third mainland bridge.

He had a knowing that his bride was on the other side. He had heard the mainland was the land of “wife-material” and equally the land of “gold-digging”.  It was the land where brains conquered brawn and cunning ruled the kingdom. He hardly had any business on the mainland except when he went to the airport. This was a new land and an adventure he was eager to embark on.
 How could he get a girl who loved him for who he was? How could he avoid the temptations of the gold-diggers and stay true to his mission? 
Was it true there was a Debonaires on the mainland? Maybe this adventure wouldn't be so bad after all.

 Dear readers, this is an SOS call! Please help the prince as he begins his journey to find a fair maiden on the streets of Lagos. 


How do you spot a gold digger? Where do you find "wife material"? Your guidance and advice would be much appreciated.....

{Please note that the prince is an actual person* but has been moderately adjusted for our purposes and his anonymity.}







Wednesday, January 14, 2015


HER 
Inspired by true events

She looks across the table as he speaks on. He still has that charm, that boyish smile, those   eyes that made her uncomfortable yet beautiful, vulnerable yet strong. She watched him as he fiddled with his pen and chatted excitedly on the phone. He had encountered life and he had mastered the seasons, his laugh lines cutting deep into the edges of his eyes as he chuckled. ‘Marry a man with laugh lines,’ her mother had said, ‘They have the best hearts.’
 That was what she did, she had married him and his laugh lines. ‘Well, mother, I’m not the only woman they crease for". She thought ruefully.
 She had served him with her days. Every single day. She had worn stupid clothes and cooked stupid dinners to entertain his stupid business partners. She had given all her savings and her inheritance for his "business plans". She had given all her passion to him, not holding anything back. 

‘I had a good time,’ the message had read. ‘Do you think we could do it again soon? I am free this weekend. I have a surprise for you if you reply in 10 minutes. xxx" ‎

She had been married to him for fifteen years and didn't even know him at all. Who was he? This man?

She had become obsessed with trying to find out who she was, this new plaything. She was pretty but that was all. Nothing intriguing about her demeanor. It couldn't be that she was just good in bed. He was attracted to strength and character. He loved a good argument and some effrontery.  She seemed like a craft project; an empty can painted by a child in an eager attempt to get commended by his teacher.

She had decided not to shed any tears, it never did her any good. She needed the rawness of the hurt, she needed the weight in the blow to make her mind up. She steadily poured herself a glass of water and drank deeply. She felt it push back the salty tears at the back of her throat.

‎She had spoken to a friend who had given her a number to call. The men would stage a robbery as they both returned from their sickening rendezvous. She wondered lazily where they were going, where they had been going. The robbers would beat him up and as for her, they could do as they pleased.
 She took another long drink of water, glared at him and turned to leave. 
‎She dialed the number and heard a gruff voice answer. What was she doing? Who was she? Were they both so lost? Trying to stage a robbery. She had become a kingpin and a criminal all in forty-eight hours. She hit the red button and sank to the floor, her knees giving in.
The tears first trickled and then flowed.
 Defeat. Bitterness. Despise. She slowly lifted her phone, scrolled down to the last dialed number and hit green. 


Author's Notes: Women are so awesome until...... ! Such a melancholy start to a blog. It gets better. haha!