Love, flicker, burn: Entry 10

‎Lanre knocked on Tiide’s door barely able to control his impulse to tear the door down, storm in, get on his knees and beg. He was desperate. His emotions were a mess, he needed her to speak to him, and he needed it now. Thankfully, he learnt to control his emotions ages ago, it made him less vulnerable, more mysterious. It was why he was such a great lawyer. He came off as confident and unruffled. Today he was ruffled, Tiide had him ruffled and very confused but still he controlled himself.

He hadn't seen her in almost two months, she was weird on the phone, she didn't want to see him and she didn't even tell him when she left for Scotland. The last eleven months couldn't have meant so little to her. Dara had told him she would be back from Scotland Sunday night and so here he was Sunday late night at her door. He knocked again, this time, louder and more urgent.

He knew she was in shock from the proposal but everyone was over that, even Lara had stopped calling her names. True, it was an awful experience standing there in the rain, ring in hand and the hushed, shocked guests but that was the past and he needed his future in sight, preferably with Tiide in it. Whether she was in or not, he was here to find that out.

The door opened. His heart stopped. Tiide stood there with a gentle smile. He just stared at her, angry and relieved at the same time. How did she just not care about him all this time? He on the other hand had fallen apart; twice. Today, he had no stalling time, he was here for definite answers and he had to get them.

‘Why have you been acting up these past weeks?’ He asked curtly.

Tiide stepped aside and opened the door wider, a gesture to come in.

That couldn’t be good. He thought. He didn't come here to let her get off that easy, besides he wasn’t going to allow her to dump him while sitting on her sofa. If she was going to dump him, he'd prefer it here in the doorway.

'You have been avoiding me! Why?'         

She looked excruciatingly sad, he wanted to hold her but he needed words not cues and silence. He needed her decision, her verdict, his sentence. Her eyes went glassy with tears. He couldn't bear to see her cry, all his self-centeredness stilled as the tears fell down her face in large drops splashing on her folded arms. He drew her to himself and held her more confused than he'd ever been.

 'Why are you crying? Did something happen?'

'No' she managed through her tears.

He pushed her back gently‎. Lara usually said he was too soft on Tiide. Her exact words were that he indulged her bratty gimmicks. He usually laughed and called her ‘the thing’, a reference to the Fantastic Four character; all rocky and emotionless. Tiide just was one of those people you had to be gentle with. Tough love just made her shut into herself.

'I will make it easier, are you still interested in us, in me, not marriage. Just you and me?' He looked into her eyes, feeling vulnerable and very lost.

‎She looked up at him hesitantly, her eyes looked slightly shadowed like there was something she wasn't saying.

'Yes, I am. I want to be with you!!', She nodded and gave a watery smile.

Lanre felt like his world began to spin again. They stood there holding each other for what felt like an hour. He couldn't help wondering why she was still crying as held her. She was probably just as happy as he was.

'IreOluwatemitiide' he whispered into her ear.

Just then, her phone vibrated in her pocket. She pulled away, smiled and blew her nose quietly on a handkerchief that came out with her phone. She looked at her phone. Her eyes widened in expectation, then they blinked quickly and stilled, riveted on the screen in what seemed like shock. Lanre instinctively glanced at her phone to see what was causing the spill of emotions over her face.

Right at the top of a long thread of messages was the name “Ugo”.

She hit the home and sleep button in quick succession and shoved the phone back. The hooded look was back in her eyes or maybe it never left.

To be continued…